Everybody wants the good things in life, but only a few possess it. I went to a conference meeting, and during the break, I decided to get fresh air so I went outside. A young man drove in a Lamborghini and the man standing beside me said: “Oh God! I can never be that lucky in my life” I replied him: “lucky? Is everything all about luck?” He said “I think so because every time I decide to go through the success road, it is always under construction. I just don’t have any luck”. Hahaha…Today, I will be addressing the mentality about success and will teach you how to be successful in life so that you can get lucky, that’s if you think success is all about luck.
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What is success?
Now, let’s get our facts right before we discuss how to be successful in life: 10 easy steps. Two men were given an axe to dig a certain location. The first man after digging found a lot of money. The second man, after digging found water. Who would you say achieved success? What is success in your opinion?
I know 99% of people reading this will say the first man achieved success. Due to the social construct, we are made to believe that success is money. We only define successful people by the amount of money they have in their account. This is a false belief about success. And this has led to many people feeling sad, unhappy, depressed and even suicidal.
What is success in life?
Success has an all-encompassing identity. Success is what you want it to be. Let me make it easy to understand. If you want a biro and you get one, that’s a success. And if you want a mansion, and you get one, that’s a success too. Success is any goal you achieve! There is no such thing as a big success or small success because success is success. According to the dictionary, success is the accomplishment of an aim or purpose.
Let me take you back to the story. The two men had a goal (a purpose) to achieve. The first man was a businessman and he needed money to clear his debt, if not his company will be taken from him. The second man was a farmer and he needed water to give to his cows, if not his cows will die.
If the farmer had found money when he dug, do you think it would have solved his problem? Oh, perhaps, you might say he will use the money to buy water. But where will he get to buy water in the desert? He needed water and he found water, so that made him a successful man. He didn’t have to go through the pain of losing his cows due to drought. On the other hand, if the businessman had found water instead, it will be of no use too. Would he use water to clear his debt?
Success is the solution to a problem
Success is all about getting what you want at the right time. Being successful in life has to do with achieving your purpose. What is your aim or purpose? It is very important to always have a goal. If you don’t have an aim to accomplish, then you cannot be successful. It’s not a curse, that’s the reality.How to be #successful in #life: 10 easy steps Click To Tweet
How to be successful in life: 10 easy steps
In the very beginning of this article, I talked about the man whose mindset was that success is all about luck. I know many people have this mentality too. They believe that any successful person just got lucky as if the person didn’t work towards being successful in life.
Perhaps, the reason why you haven’t enjoyed success yet is that you are waiting for luck to come your way, whereas what you need is to take action and set your life in the right motion. Being successful isn’t luck; it takes a conscious effort to make it happen. You can’t know how to be successful in life if your perception about success is that success is just by luck. ‘Success’ doesn’t appreciate those who under-appreciate it worth. Success has values, and its values are determination, persistence, focus, hard work, patience, failure, sacrifice, dedication etc. And how can you acknowledge these values, if you summarize success as luck?
Yes, I agree that luck does exist and I believe in luck. But luck doesn’t strive on its own, it needs an avenue. What do I mean? For example, let’s assume you got lucky and won a contract. If you had not prepared the avenue of developing your skills, writing and submitting that proposal, going for meetings, connecting with the right people etc. Luck won’t have anything to strive on. If you haven’t put your work or talent out there, luck won’t come your way because luck has nothing to strive on.
Success is not all about luck; it is a combination of everything.
Success doesn’t happen overnight, every successful person has a story to tell. People, most especially the younger generations keep saying they want to be as successful and rich as Bill Gate, but they are not ready to do what Bill Gate has done. They are not ready to hussle and work hard. Instead, they are waiting for luck to shine on them. Wake up! It doesn’t work that way. Bill Gate worked hard and worked smart to become successful.
Do you want to be successful in life? Now is the best time to know how to be successful in life. Follow the success tips below and soon you will excel in life. I will give you easy 10 steps; the STOPs and STARTs. You will have to stop doing some things and start doing some things to succeed in life. Without further ado, let’s get to business.
How to be successful in life: 10 easy steps list
- Stop getting distracted from your goals
- Stop living in past glory
- Stop seeking perfection
- Stop pleasing everyone
- Stop avoiding risks
- Stop playing the victim
- Start changing your perception of success
- Start valuing time
- Start surrounding yourself with the right people
- Start taking responsibility for your life
1. Stop getting distracted from your goals
I know you believe that the more things you do, the higher your chances to become successful. But that thought is far from reality. The more things you do, the higher the distractions and the higher the chances of failure. You won’t stay committed enough to get to the level of reaping results.
For example, you decided to become a fashion designer. You were still learning fashion designing when your friend told you that programming has numerous opportunities. So, you decided to also start learning programming by the side. Few weeks after, you went for a conference and you were told that public speaking is a good career option to be successful. So, you decided to become a public speaker and started taking public speaking courses too. Again, you read somewhere online that accountants receive high pay, so you decided to start learning accounting too. Now, you are learning fashion designing, programming, public speaking and accounting together. Do you think you will be an expert in anyone? Are you even passionate about anyone?
According to you, you have decided to learn everything because you have the “who knows which one will pay off” mindset. The reality is that though you think you are learning, you are learning to fail. You won’t be good enough for any of the career position. In worse situation, you won’t even know how to do anything at all. This is because your commitment and dedication are already compromised.
Quench your desire to learn everything about everything
Ayobami, are you saying it is bad to be a jack of all trades? No, I think it is good to be a jack of all trades. Though, many people do believe that being a jack of all trades is very bad. I don’t agree with that because as humans, we have the ability to be multi-talented.
My philosophy is to “learn something about everything and learn everything about something”. This means that you should always endeavour to learn something about everything, it doesn’t matter if it is related to your area of specialization or not. And you should learn everything within your area of specialization.
It is always good to have general knowledge because it makes you adaptable, and build more confidence in you. However, you also have to specialize in something by learning everything about something. This is where most people get it wrong. They dedicate their time to learning everything about everything. If you are trying to learn everything, remember that there’s a lot to learn and you will explode doing so. If you want to be successful in life, I urge you to quench your desire to learn everything about everything because it will lead to frustration, stress, failure, and depression.
It’s OK to try different things if you haven’t figured out what you want yet.
Some people need to try multiple paths before they discover their unique path. However, it’s important to discover your path. You have to decide what you want to do with your life and focus on that. Think of what you want to achieve in life, and start working towards it. And when you eventually discover your path, don’t divert from it. Don’t think that following all the multiple paths will increase your chances of success because it won’t. Stop diverting from your goals because it’s harmful to your future. Remember, every single road leads to a place, but not every road leads to the right place.
Do you want to know how to be successful in life? Have your goals in mind and don’t divert from your goals. You have to be persistent, committed, and dedicated to your goals if you want success in life. Constantly remind yourself of your ultimate goal. And if you have to adjust or change your goal, don’t do it because of social pressure, or general belief. Do it because you genuinely have a personal reason.
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How to be successful in life: Powerful Tips
- Keep your vision and goal in mind.
- Control your internal urge to be easily influenced.
- Improve discipline.
- Focus with intention.
2. Stop living in past glory
Living in past glory is a danger signal; it makes you dwell in the past and hinders your future success. As soon as you start living in your past glory, you stop noticing opportunities because you are feeling satisfied with your achievements already and you don’t see a need to put the effort into something else.
Past glory is like a child whose parent promised to take to the beach. As they got closer to the beach, the child saw a small pool and started playing in it. After a while, the parent told the child that it’s time to move on to see the beach but the child was like “I’m satisfied here. This is the biggest water body ever”. Living in past glory makes you neglect your goals and vision.
Focus on the big picture
Do you think you don’t live in past glory? You might be in for a surprise. A lot of people are living in past glory without knowing. Past glory is not just the accomplished you enjoyed in the past, it could also be the accomplishment you earned in the past but still relevant in your present.
Are you confused? I will help you out. For example, let’s say your business was awarded the best establishment in your niche last year. That’s an achievement you enjoyed last year (past). Let’s now say last year, your business was awarded a 2 years contract to work with a top organization in the world. This will be an achievement you earned last year (past) but you will still enjoy it in your present moment till the end of the second year. This type of past glory makes you feel satisfied and you take a break from pursuing other opportunities until the time expires (after the 2 years contract ended), that’s when it hits you that you have to find another opportunity or something else to do. But it could be too late by then because you might have missed some life-changing opportunities.
Your past glory could be skills you learned in the past and you are so proud of it. You are always making references to them. This mindset will not encourage you to improve your skills and before you know it, that skill will become outdated because the world keeps evolving. There was a time car were driven manually, but not anymore. There was a time when the typewriter machine was the usual, but not anymore.
Be proud of your achievement but don’t dwell on it
It is good to have things you are proud of in the past because it improves self-motivation and builds your confidence to pursue your goals. However, don’t focus on your past glory. Focusing on past glory is a roadblock to success. It won’t make you move forward in life. Do you want to know how to be more successful? Stop living in past glory. It’s that simple.
Ayobami, how will I know that I am living in past glory? Check your thoughts. If your thought is always quick to think of your past glories, that could be an indication that you are living in past glory. Also, do self-reflection and see if there is anything in your present that you can boast of. If there is nothing, it could be an indication that you are living in past glory.
How to be successful in life: Powerful Tips
- Celebrate your past achievements and move on.
- Start making good use of the present.
- Constantly remind yourself of your ultimate goal.
- Visualize your future
3. Stop seeking perfection
This might come to you as a surprise because you believe that seeking perfection is necessary to achieve success. The truth is that seeking perfection will hinder you from achieving success. Can you name a successful person you think he or she is perfect? No one is perfect, so stop seeking perfection. In fact, success doesn’t come to those who seek perfection so it’s a waste of time to seek perfection.
I know someone who spent over 15, 000 dollars just to launch his business idea but he never did because he was seeking perfection. He planned to start a business that has everything but he failed because things don’t work that way (you cannot start a perfect business). He wanted to start a company like Facebook at once. Many people advised him that he should launch his idea first and with time, he will start adding other amazing features (scale-up) but he was adamant to seek perfection. Nothing his team did was good enough to him. He spent a lot of money, time and energy but everything went down the drain.
Facebook, Google, Amazon etc, didn’t start as a perfect business. There is always a process and if you don’t honour the process, you will get kicked-out (the process of growth). Those companies grew towards perfection. With time, they started making upgrades and started adding some features too.
The truth is that when you seek perfection, it will make you deny the fact that there is room for improvement. It won’t let you start working on your goals because you will be waiting for the perfect time and perfect circumstances to start, whereas you will be losing out of opportunities.
Seeking perfection fuels self-doubt.
You start doubting your abilities, your goals, your decisions and your actions. To me, seeking perfection is seeking out fear. It fills your heart will immerse fear; fear of the future, fear of failure, fear of not good enough, fear of making mistakes, fear of rejection etc. So, why seek perfection?
Seeking perfection makes you live a fake life. You can’t seek perfection and expect to be authentic and real, it’s not possible. This is because seeking perfection makes you deny yourself the expression of your real self. Your life would be like a movie with a script to act out (no authenticity).
Ayobami, you said that I should stop seeking perfection, so are you saying I shouldn’t aim to be better? No. I am an advocate for self-improvement and personal development. I want you to stop seeking perfection but you should aim for perfection (to be the best at what you do).
Difference between seeking perfection and aiming for perfection
There is a difference between seeking perfection and aiming for perfection. When you seek perfection, it means you are looking for perfection. And when you are looking for something, that thing takes away all your attention. You spend your resources (time, energy, money) looking for that thing. On the other hand, when you aim for perfection, it means you are pointing towards perfection. And when you are pointing towards something, it keeps you on the move by directing your action towards the thing you target.
Aiming for perfection encourages you to start working on being or having a better version of what already exists. Growth and success always aim towards perfection. When a seed is planted, it starts growing gradually until it reaches its full cycle (the perfect state).
How will you determine the state of perfection? When is perfect perfect? Seeking perfection puts you in an endless state of anxiety whereas aiming for perfection makes you find the perfect fit for you. Something is perfect doesn’t mean it is the perfect fit for you.
Stop believing that perfection is the real deal, it not. What you need is a PERFECT FIT, not perfection. Aim towards perfection; grow to be the best version of you (the perfect fit).
Do you want to know how to become successful in life? Stop seeking perfection.
How to be successful in life: Powerful Tips
- Change your mindset.
- Start where you are.
- Learn to let go.
- Exploit the power of now.
4. Stop pleasing everyone
Are you the type that loves pleasing everyone and you are wondering why you are not successful? The question I have for you is: How do you plan to achieve success in life since you’ve made your life an ice-cream? Obviously, you will be consumed.
If you a people pleaser, you will feel exhausted. You will spend your resources (time, money, energy) pleasing others and your life goals will be abandoned because there won’t be resources left to spend. From experience, I realize that most people that love to please everyone do it not because they actually love to please, but because they are afraid of rejection, loneliness and criticism.
The first step to stop pleasing everyone is to come to terms with yourself. For you to come to terms with yourself, you need to practice self-awareness and self-validation. You have to know what you want, what you want to do, how to take your stand and make firm decisions.
Stop being a people pleaser! It’s not healthy
If you want to succeed in life, you have to know how to please yourself before pleasing others. I am not saying you shouldn’t help people. It is always good to help because you are not only doing it for the helpee, you are doing it for yourself too because it will help improve your mood and mental health. However, there is a limit to everything! Water is harmless. Doctors will advise that you should drink a lot of water. But, they will also tell you that drinking too much water is dangerous which can lead to water intoxication and cause seizures and brain damage. Learn to know the limit! If you are helping someone at the expense of your life, stop it.
If you want to help anybody, first thing is to consider if it worth it. For example, a child falls into the lion’s den and he is crying out to me to help him. I have to consider is it worth it. I can’t just jump into the lion’s den because I want to help the boy. Yes, I still want to help the boy but my first option (jumping inside) doesn’t worth it so I will think of another option. OK, I could come up with another option to call the professionals who work at the zoo to help. The second option worth it because the professionals will know exactly what to do to save the boy’s life.
It is not advisable to help anybody based on impulse
You have to consider if it worth it. You don’t have to give excuses but genuinely express your resolution. If you won’t do it after considering your options, then don’t be afraid to tell the person ‘No’. You have your life to live and you owe it to your life to properly manage it by considering its interest and well being. God knows we are supposed to put ourselves first, that’s why for Christians, we are told to love our neighbours as ourselves not more than ourselves. The reality is that you can’t make everyone happy, so stop putting everyone before yourself.
Remember you have a choice!
Know when and how to say ‘NO’ and stand by it and don’t apologize for your decision (being who you are). The sad thing is that when people around you know that you love to please everyone, they will start manipulating you to do things you are not comfortable doing. And on the long run, this will lead to regret, feeling worthless because you lost control over your life, depression and anguish.
Do you want to know how to be successful in life? Don’t fear criticism. Criticism is a sign that shows that you are making progress. If you are not doing anything, no criticism will surface. In fact, success comes with its own fair share of criticism. Nobody has time criticizing someone that has no future, no ambition and no life goal. That person doesn’t worth critics time and energy.
The moment you start receiving criticism, you should be rejoicing because it means your life is becoming relevant and worth it. It means you are either getting closer to achieving success or you are already living a successful life. Learn how to effectively manage criticism.
How to be successful in life: Powerful Tips
- Set your priorities.
- Learn to validate yourself.
- Before helping anyone, consider if it worth it.
- Be authentic: stand by your decision.
5. Stop avoiding risks
Do you want to know how to be successful in life? Then stop avoiding risks because life itself is a risk. Success strives on risk-taking. If you don’t take a risk, how will you have an outcome? For example, if you don’t take the risk of sleeping today, how will you know if you will see tomorrow or not? When you sleep and wake up, only then are you sure that you have seen a new day.
Everything in life is uncertain, so for you to know the real result of something, you have to try it first. To try means to take risks. When you take risks, you open yourself to the world of possible outcomes, some of which may not turn out as expected. However, regardless of the outcome, you will be able to take advantage of the situation. If the outcome is negative, now you know that method doesn’t work and you will start focusing on other approaches. And if the outcome is positive, then you know what works already and you will start focusing on that to help you achieve your goals and become successful.
Life is an experiment
The more experiments, the better the experience and outcome. Taking risks will help you to take advantage of opportunities around you. I am not saying you should take any risk that crosses your path, because that’s dangerous. I am saying you should take intelligent and calculated risks.
When taking risks, the first thing you should do is to determine if it’s an intelligent risk and if it worth it. If you take dumb risks, you will lose it all. Therefore always weigh your pros and cons before taking any risks. Also, it is not advisable to start with taking big risks; take small risks as often as possible. This will help increase your experience with risks taking and empower you to achieve more positive outcomes.
Be realistic about what could go wrong
Risk doesn’t work well with faith. If you are taking risks, don’t say I have faith everything will be fine and then ignore the reality of the possible outcomes. Yes, it is good to think positively, in fact, I strongly advise that you focus on positive thoughts so that you won’t be overwhelmed with worry and fear. But, at the same time be realistic too so that you can prepare your mind for the outcome (lose or win).
Before taking any intelligent risks, gather your courage first and have a mindset that “it’s ok to fail; you will learn from it” Have a plan for failure. Ask yourself, “If it fails, what will I do”. Prepare your mind for whatever outcome you get and have alternative plans to counter the effect of failure.
For example, you take a risk of investing in a business. Your house rent expires in the next 3 months, and you’ve already used the money you have to invest in the business. Though you’re expecting a hugely positive outcome that could make you a landlord within 3 months, it’s wise to plan for failure too. Planning for failure, in this case, means making plans for alternatives. If the business should fail, what other means do you have to pay your house rent? If you don’t have other means, then don’t take the risk now because you don’t want to be homeless later in future.
Know when to stop taking a risk
Another thing is to know the limit. Know that you can always back out because it’s ok to back out if you realize it’s not right for you. You have the power to decide if you want to go on or not. And it’s ok to change your mind, and go with your gut. ‘STOP’ is a safe word for taking risks. When the risk is getting dangerous and reckless, then don’t be afraid to say the safe word. It doesn’t mean you gave up, it means you wise up. Knowing when to draw the boundary is wisdom.
It is important to know that risk-taking can expose you to potential loss, rejection, embarrassment, criticism, and failure. Right now, the question on your mind could be: why then should I take risks to be successful in life? Does the whole risk-taking worth it? Yes, it does worth it. If you don’t take risks, you will stay stagnate in life, without hope for the future. Every success is built on risks taking. If you don’t do anything, you won’t get anything. If you plant, you reap and if you don’t plant, you don’t have anything to reap. Bear in mind that it’s possible to plant and not reap. But even if you don’t reap, you will learn something from your experience and experience is a very good teacher to direct the course of your life. But if you don’t plant, there will be no hope for you to reap.
No one is immune to failure
Successful people often fail too. They are not immune to failure. In fact, they are grateful for their failures, mistakes and embarrassment because it made them know better. Successful people keep fighting to excel. They keep taking actions (taking intelligent risks) until they are able to succeed in life. Taking intelligent risks doesn’t guarantee a positive outcome, but it does guarantee knowledge. Your knowledge will increase.
Write down your goals in life
Think of the things you want to achieve and start making plans on how to achieve it. Every action you take to achieve your goals is rooted in risk-taking. If there is any action that needs to be taken to achieve your goals, then give it a try. Don’t underestimate your potentials or abilities. If there is one thing to do to succeed in life, it will be to never stop trying to succeed. There is no advancement in life without risk.
How to be successful in life: Powerful Tips
- Identify what you want to achieve.
- Think of the possible worst thing that could happen.
- Decide whether the risk is worth taking or not.
- Be ready to accept the outcome- lose or win.
6. Stop playing the victim card
We are often quick to think that we are the victim of circumstances because it’s easy to think that way especially when life isn’t treating us well as we expected. We start to indulge in self-pity and start playing the victim card.
The reality is that we won’t always have everything we want in life. Life won’t always give us what we deserve because life is naturally unfair. At one point in our life, we will become a victim to life: we will feel helpless and passive in the face of ill-treatment or misfortune.
Successful people feel helpless too.
Successful people are faced with misfortune as well. However, successful people have learned never to play the victim card even when they are truly the victim. This is because playing the victim card is self-destructive.
Do you want to know how to be successful in life? Then stop playing the victim card. When you are faced with life challenges and the going is tough, don’t play the victim card. Don’t start having the “poor me” attitude or the “life is against me” attitude.
When you find yourself in the situation that makes you feel powerless, oppressed or stuck, it’s easier to accept defeat, wallow in self-pity and feel miserable for yourself because that’s the escape route readily available. However, it’s also the most dangerous thing you can do to yourself because you are self-sabotaging your goals, dream and accomplishment in life.
For example, you feel stuck with your job. You hate doing the job. You know quite well that the job you are doing is destroying your self-image, your confidence and your dream. But you keep telling yourself that you have no choice because you have to put food on the table, and you have bills to pay. So, you decided to wallow in self-pity. Or you found yourself in an unhealthy relationship, and you are very much aware that it can’t be fixed but you feel stuck in that relationship because you are afraid of starting afresh.
You have the power to make a change
You know you can change your ugly situation if you want to. There is no situation you cannot redefine (re-frame). It’s just a question of ‘how willing are you?’ The power to redefine your situation lies in the choice you make. No matter what happens to you in life, you will always have a choice to either accept the status quo or redefine it. Yes, it is difficult and scary to make a choice, the right choice of not accepting defeat. But it is better than the regret of not making the right choice.
Have a strong desire to succeed
If you really want to be successful in life, let’s the desire for success inspire you to find the courage to make the right choice. I know you are afraid to make a change but the truth is that success comes with change. Find the courage to make a big change in your life now. If your situation is miserable, work on changing it.
Don’t always put yourself in the position of a victim. If you find yourself in the victim position, shift your position by changing your mindset and taking responsibilities for your actions. If the situation you are facing puts you in a victim position, change your mindset towards that situation and take deliberate actions to never accept defeat. And if it’s people putting you in a victim position, then start to set clear boundaries and stick to them.
Make up your mind to never accept defeat. Yeah, defeat might come, but you will never accept it. Also, learn to reflect on your situation so that you can know your mistake if you have made one and also learn from your mistake.
How to be successful in life: Powerful Tips
- Always remember you have a choice.
- Take responsibilities for your actions.
- Make up your mind to never accept defeat.
- Commit fully to your dream/ goals in life.
What you should start doing
We have successfully covered the six things you must STOP doing in order to become successful in life. Now, let’s discuss what you have to START doing to achieve success.
7. Start changing your perception of success
Most of us have the wrong perception of success. We think that success is exclusively based on the amount of money in your account, and what you possess. We often forget that success is different from being rich (or wealthy). There are many rich people out there who are not successful. You don’t believe me? Let me give you an example. A man got a heritance worth $600 million from his deceased parent. After 2 years, his total worth was calculated to be $400 million. Yes, he’s still very rich but he’s a failure. Success means advancement. In his case, he didn’t advance.
I simply define success as advancement. If you record advancement in whatever you do, that’s a success.
For example, if you decide to learn how to ride a horse and eventually you can ride a horse (advancement), that’s a huge success. If you decide to run 2 miles (3219m) and you did without giving up, that’s a huge success. If you decide to become a stay at home dad to take care of the children, and you did without wavering, that’s a huge success. What if, you decide to not get married, and you didn’t get married despite the social and family pressure, that’s a huge success. If you decide to become a housewife to take care of the family, and you did despite the challenges, that’s a huge success. If you decide to become a career woman, and you did despite the uncertainty, that’s a huge success. I can go on and on to give you examples of success.
Success is all about your decision; what you want
Whatever you want, if you work towards it and achieve it, it means you are successful. Success is subject to your terms. Whatever terms you set, will define your success. That’s why to be successful; you first have to make a decision. Therefore, it is very important to first define your own success, so that you can have a clear picture of what you want to achieve. Your decisions should be the goals you want to pursue and the accomplishment of these goals means success.
In fact, I feel it is very important to tell you that you are successful. Wait a sec, are you laughing? Oh, do you think I must have made a mistake? Or maybe I am referring to someone else and not you? I am actually referring to you. Yes, you that is reading this article right now. You might think you are far from being successful but it’s a lie. You are already successful. The truth is that it’s your perception that makes you walk around feeling miserable because you think you are a failure. It’s already in your head that success is wealth and since you don’t have money now or you are not living in a mansion, you perceive yourself as a failure.
You are a successful person
The truth is that you have attained unbelievable heights (achievements) unknown to you. I want you to do something for me. Reflect on your life: Think of the things you wanted to do or the things you wanted to have. Think of what you did to make it happen. And then think of the ones you eventually got or did. If you can name at least one thing you wanted and achieved it, then you are successful. Stop going about, thinking you are a failure because you are not.
I want so many things in my life. I have goals I want to achieve in my career, personal life, family, emotionally and spiritually. Being wealthy is also one of my goals. Right now, I can’t say I am wealthy but still won’t call myself a failure because I’m in the process of becoming wealthy regardless of the setbacks and challenges. Also, I always recognize the other goals I have accomplished, and I am proud to call myself a successful person. The success of those accomplished goals instils confidence in me to go on to pursue other ‘yet-to-accomplish goals’ of mine.
Always measure your progress!
Recognize what you have accomplished thus far and be grateful for it. If you have any goal you want to achieve and you’ve achieved it, rejoice and reaffirm yourself as a successful person. Don’t be afraid to use the word “successful” to describe yourself. Success has nothing to do with your bank account. Well, except if your goal is focused on your bank account. Success is whatever your goal is focused on. If you achieve the goal, you are successful.
Change your perception of success. If you don’t, you won’t even know when you have achieved success. For example, if you hold on to the perception that success is money, it means that when you have accomplished other things in life, you won’t regard those things as a success. You will continue to feel like a failure until you have the money. And when you eventually get the money and think that you should regard yourself as being successful, you might not be able to call yourself successful by then because you will realize that other things which are important to you are crumbing e.g. family or relationship and this could lead to depression.
Money is only one aspect of life, and many other aspects of life are very important too. If you have a happy home or a job you are passionate about or you are living the lifestyle you want, celebrate that success. Don’t disregard those because you don’t have money yet.
The concept of success is shaped by your perceptions
If you want to be successful, first define what success means to you. Decide what you want to achieve and write down your goals. You don’t have to necessarily have your goals written on a paper but you should know your goals. Let it be deeply rooted in your mind, thoughts and actions. And learn to start measuring your progress. This is will help build your confidence and improve self-esteem.
How to be successful in life: Powerful Tips
- Transform your perspective.
- Monitor your thought processes.
- Recognize the small victories.
- Measure your progress.
8. Start valuing time
You can’t have the constant habit of disregarding time and expect to be successful in life. Every successful person knows that time is a very important factor that determines one’s success. The first thing to do to succeed in life is to start respecting and valuing time.
I know you have heard it a thousand times that the time lost can never be regained. So, I don’t understand why you would continue to joke with your time and expect to be successful.
There are many things life doesn’t distribute equally. Everyone knows life is unfair, but there is one thing life distributed equally to everyone and that’s time.
Everyone has 24 hours per day to spend regardless of their financial background, family background, race or gender. If you are not spending your time wisely, that’s your fault no one else because you can’t complain that others have more time than you do.
Life is so fragile. Do you know how many people have died today? Do you know those people who died today already had plans for tomorrow without knowing that tomorrow will never come for them? It will be a shame to waste the opportunity of a lifetime to fulfil the purpose of your life. What value do you place on your time to see your dream come true? If you don’t value time before, you should start valuing it now because that’s the most valuable asset life offers you.
Master the art of time management
The lack of time management leads to failure. Start prioritizing important tasks and stop putting off tasks to do. If you have something to do, do it now. At least, ‘now’ is guaranteed but tomorrow isn’t guaranteed.
If you want to be successful, you have to understand that time plays a vital role when pursuing your goal. Your goals depend on time to come to fulfilment. Let every minute count because it is easy to get distracted by things that are not important while the important things are left undone.
Spend time on yourself; you have to spend a lot of time to achieve your dream in life. Stop wasting that time by putting others’ needs ahead of your own. Remember I already talked about this under “stop pleasing everyone”. Avoid destiny wasters; those who waste your time.
Do you want to be successful? Learn to value your time. Avoid wasting your time because time is very valuable.
How to be successful in life: Powerful Tips
- Master the art of time management.
- Cutaway anything or anyone that waste your time.
- Stop putting things off.
- Be organized and focus on the big picture.
9. Start surrounding yourself with the right people
The people you surround yourself with are very important to the fulfilment of your life goals. We have two sets of people; those people who give positive energy (optimistic) and those who give negative energy (pessimistic).
People who radiate negative energy are judgmental, they vent all the time (complainers), like to put others down, they are overly dramatic, bad news is exciting to them, they can’t see good in anything, and success doesn’t mean much to them. Associating with this set of people is a total drag. There is enough negativity in the world, stop suffocating yourself with negativity if you want to be successful. The truth is that consciously or unconsciously, their negative vibes will start affecting you and will slow down your progress in life.
You should associate yourself with people that radiate positive energy; people who are happy, compassionate, supportive, kind, assertive, and inspiring. If you want to become successful, surround yourself with people who elevate you, people who are already successful and super supportive. You need people who will support you in every step you take towards achieving your life goals.
It is easier to want to surround yourself with people you are smarter than because when you are with them, you feel like a genius but it’s detrimental to your growth and success. It’s best to associate yourself with people who are better than you to avoid limiting yourself. These people will challenge you to be a better version of yourself. They will help you discover your hidden strength and push the boundaries of your potential.
Get in touch with people who have achieved the goal you want to achieve
If you know someone who has achieved the goal you are planning to achieve, start associating yourself with that person so that you can learn one or two things from them to help you to achieve your goal too. It’s not always wise to experience everything and learn from your mistake, know how to learn from others experience instead because it will help you save time and avoid unfortunate pitfalls that could lead to immense pain or regret.
How to surround yourself with positive people
First think of where you want to go and think of people who are likely to want what you want (people who are dreamers, learners and are inquisitive) and then connect with your choice (those you share the right chemistry with). Choose new, like-minded friends.
Do you want to know how to be successful in life? Start reflecting on your life. Think of the type of people surrounding you. Do the people around you drag you down? When you share your ideas with them, do they always have a negative thing to say about it? Do they make you doubt your abilities? Do they ever contribute to your ideas? If they are the type that gives negative energy as explained above, don’t hesitate to cut them out of your life. Your life should be your priority and anything or anyone that won’t let you live a successful life doesn’t deserve to be present in your life (regardless of their relationship to you). Set boundaries with those people. Stop participating in meaningless discussions and maintain a healthy distance from them.
Surrounding yourself with the right people changes everything. It makes you more energetic, positive and productive. Surround yourself with people you are comfortable enough with to share your fear and doubt. Always remember that you should only share your ideas with people who are supportive and willing to help you become better by giving constructive criticism.
How to be successful in life: Powerful Tips
- Know you are in control of your life.
- Surround yourself with positive and successful people.
- Cut off negative influences.
- Set clear and healthy boundaries.
10. Start taking responsibility for your life
If you want to be successful in life, know how to take responsibility for your life. Take control of your happiness, thoughts, failure and success.
Everything you get out of life is a direct result of your action. Even if your mentality is based on getting lucky, the luck as well is going to be a result of your action. In life, you must do something to get something. That’s the principle of life. Life is all about exchange (give and take). You give carbon dioxide to get oxygen. You give the seed, to get fruit. If you are not taking any action towards your life success, you will not get any positive outcome in return.
Do you want to be successful in life? Set goals and start working towards them. When setting your goals, make sure to set SMART goals. Goals that are specific, measurable, attainable, relevant and time-bound. Then draw an action plan (think of how to achieve those goals). Taking responsibility means you are ready to acknowledge the outcome of your action. If you work towards your goals and you fail, taking responsibility means you will acknowledge the failure, analyze the reason why you failed and learn from it.
Successful people know how to take responsibility that’s why even when they fail they will learn from their failure and keep moving. They know that through failure comes growth and development. The truth is that failure is also a key to success. It gives you a better understanding and redirects your path to find the right way to make things work and become successful.
Meaning of taking responsibility
Taking responsibility means acknowledging both the positive and negative outcome you get in life. If it’s a positive outcome, rejoice and celebrate. And if it’s a negative outcome, learn from it and don’t let it hold you back from achieving your goals.
Stop making excuses. Stop the “if only” attitude and get to work. Work for the realization of your dream. Build your self-esteem by loving yourself. Do whatever makes you happy. Do what you expect from yourself and not what people expect from you because it is your life. It is only when you have learned to be at peace with yourself (embrace who you are), can you learn how to take responsibility for your life.
For how long do you want to be blaming others for your life? Do they own your life? So why do you expect them to take responsibility for it? Stop blaming your family, spouse, children, friend, government, country, etc. Stop blaming and complaining. I already told you to stop playing the victim card. If you take responsibility for your own life now, others will start respecting your life because you have already placed a value on it. They will learn how to treat you right because they are now aware that you know your worth and won’t go for anything less than what you deserve.
Live in the present moment
The past is gone and the future is uncertain but you have today already. Do what you have to do now. Learn to take a step at a time. Life is a process and you have to be ready to follow the process or else you will end up in frustration. Take responsibility for your thoughts, feelings, words and actions. Be kind and think deep before taking any action to avoid future regret.
How to be successful in life: Powerful Tips
- Take ownership of your life.
- Be clear about your purpose and vision.
- Do whatever makes you happy.
- Always seek to learn.
Success is every goal you achieve. Therefore, focus on achieving your set goals. Please know that there is no point at which you can say, ‘Well, I’m successful now. I can as well take a break.’ If you decide to take a break, you might as well lose all you’ve worked for. To live a successful life, be ready to ALWAYS work towards it. It’s one thing to achieve success, it’s another thing to maintain the success achieved. Don’t just aim to achieve success; learn to maintain your success. Take every moment you have to improve yourself.
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Copyright by Ayobami Abiodun